Oct 29, 2011

Toilet Pranks

I must share with you some great toilet pranks, the enormous amount of likes convinced me you will like it too. All pranks are just for laughing, but some gone wrong.
Toilet at Conference Room

OMG I Just  Pee On My Pants.

Replace The Mirror, Or My Eyes
Hey Don't Fuck With Me.

Wrong Toilet Side

Oct 26, 2011

Give Me Two Pound

   Rabbi Abe enter the butcher shop showing on a nice piece of ham, and ask the butcher "Moses give me two pound of that nice lamb" Moses the butcher replies "Rabbi Abe, sorry to tell you, that's not lamb, that's pork" ( Jewish religious forbid eating pork) 
Rabbi Abe proceed "I didn't ask you the name of that chunk, just give me two pounds" LOL

For the Muslims too pork i forbidden. so if you like tell it about a Muslim Kadi (religious court judge)  

Butcher preparing fresh frankfurters 

Hog Hunters

Oct 24, 2011

Bruno Torfs Art Garden

    This morning I received an E-mail from my friend with the presentation of an art gallery near the town Marysville, Victoria Australia. I enjoyed the artwork, the sculptures and the rainforest, and somehow I didn't realized it's almost all over, cause the great bushfire occurred on Feb, 7,2009.  After some investigation I find out that most of the sculptures have been destroyed. Some locals said more then 50% survived the hellfire, miracle or cause of the treatments given to the materials.
The Rainforest Art Gallery - Bruno Torfs
Prior the Bushfire 

After the fire.

Now Bruno and his team are restoring the garden which is now re-opened to the public.The gallery is near completion. all Bruno needs now is lots of visitors!
God Bless that Garden, please skip Art Galleries on the next hellfire.
More links - Link
Bruno Torfs  site 

Oct 23, 2011

In the Year 2525

   Idiocracy is a 2006 American film, a satirical science fiction comedy, directed by Mike Judge and starring Luke Wilson, Maya Rudolph, Dax Shepard, and Terry Crews.

   The film tells the story of two ordinary people who are taken into a top-secret military hibernation experiment which goes awry, and awaken 500 years in the future. They discover that the world has degenerated into a dystopia where advertising, commercialism, and cultural anti-intellectualism run rampant and dysgenic pressure has resulted in a uniformly stupid human society devoid of intellectual curiosity, social responsibility and coherent notions of justice and human rights. Rather, this future society emphasizes anti-intellectualism, popularity, sexual attraction, and hedonism. Despite its lack of a major theatrical release, the film has achieved a cult following. source
Idiocracy Trailer

So while watching that film, I remembered the vision which will waiting us 20 years later. I wish you all to live till 2511 and hope to meet you reading my blogs.
In The year 2525
In the year 2525 fantasy clip

In the year 2525, are these apes gonna change?

Oct 14, 2011

Job Interview Goes Wrong

   Just after the great war, Hans and Kurt emigrate from Berlin to New York. Both didn't understand English at all, but an old friend advise them, to look for signs with the word Jobs. As you know those years the economy sucks and the two young Germans were wandering the streets day after day, looking for a job. One day they see a sign Jobs Vacant. Hans told Kurt "go in, you are the smart guy, try to get a job for us"

Ten minutes later Kurt returns pissed off. "whats up? how was the job interview?" demands Hans
"I entered the room, two men and a woman, were sitting at the table, and they start asking me questions" replied Kurt. "well?" said Hans.
Kurt continued "the tall man ask me": "DO YOU SPEAK ENGLISH?" and I nodded twice.
The shorty told me "SHOW US YOUR HAND" I understand cause its similar to German Hand, so I showed my hand.
The tall continued "SHOW US YOUR FOOT" again I understand cause its similar to German Fuß (Fuss), so I showed my foot.
You do great said Hans, ALSO? (German)
Kurt proceeds, "then the woman asks "DO YOU SMOKE?" here I should be wrong......I opened the zipper and show them my schmuck!

Job Interview - Funny

That's how a job interview should looks

Oct 9, 2011

Taxi Driver

   While I was diving in the tubes of YouTube, searching for some materials for my previous post, fortunately I found some great clips made by the Z'AIME team from Benin. There are about 40 episodes, which I choose the most favorite. Even though they speaks French, you will love them as me. 
   The plot is about a Taxi driver running his bike. The boy is working hard to make the money for a four wheel vehicle. But he must be a schlemiel, cause always he finds himself at the mediators desk.
p.s. All the cabs in NYC are yellow, but here all the drivers wears yellow shirts, nice isn't it?.

La grosse dame - Small head but huge ass. Learn more about her ass development.

Z'AIME: Le peteur - Take me to the Toilet ASAP.

Z'AIME : Mini Jupe (Mini Skirt) 

That taxi driver must be an optical engineer or maybe just a voyeur. When we were 7-8 years old, we use mirrors to investigate the colors of our girlfriends underwear. It's always nice to learn some new tricks.

Z'AIME: Changement de cliente - Horny Taxi Driver.


Dwarf Tossing

I read an article about "Midget tossing soon to be legal again!!"  Link.  So I searched the web and found many interest facts about this kind of "show Business". Let me hear your opinion, why dwarf people can't get an ordinary job? would you hire a midget as a Doctor? or a teller in your bank?
Let me hear about "little people" which are occupied in your company. 
Dwarf Throwing
Dwarf Toss 2007 "Midget Tossing"
Dwarf Throwing WA

Dwarf Tossing "Sport"!!! 

Midget Bowling

Oct 8, 2011

You Need A Liquor License

My Friend Gordon went out pubing, he enter into a new bar he never visited before. Gordon took his place next to an attractive blonde and orders a beer.

The bartender fills the mug and  slides it down the bar. It hits the blonde woman's boobs and splashes all over them... 
The bartender goes over, retrieves the mug and licks  the beer off her boobs.
Next time the blonde calls for another beer. This happens again. So after the third beer, Gordon decides to help the bartender out. The next time the bartender hit her boobs, Gordon jumps up and  starts to lick her boobs and she decks him!
He is lying on the floor moaning, "Jeez lady, why do you let the bartender do  it?'
"Duh," says the  blonde, "He has a licker license!"
Spread the laughter, share the cheer
Let's be happy while we are  here!

Oct 6, 2011

Those Were The Days

My friend sent me today that clip, so now we may enjoy Studio Alexander Petrov again. That's took me back to my childhood days to the odd world when kids played with sticks and stones. Tears trickled from my eyes as I remembered the old days.

One More Time 2010

Now you can navigate on youtube to some more of Alexander Petrov animation like my first love part 1 - Link and part 2 - Link

NYC - Street Games

Kids playing with wheels - India

Oct 3, 2011

Hotel Extra Charges

   Uncle Thomas and his gorgeous wife went for their Honeymoon to Cancun. Uncle Thomas made a reservation for a five star hotel at a special deal, full board for 500 bucks per week. Just imagine that 500 bucks, at those days were like five grand today. Of course the young couple spent most of the days at their room viewing the ceiling, you know what I mean?

   When they check out, Uncle Thomas notice the bill shows $1,410, $500 for the package deal and $910 extras. Uncle Thomas asked the receptionist "Please explain me what are the extras mean" The receptionist shows him the details:
- Swimming pool beverages ten bucks per person per day.. ......10*2*7 = $140
- Tennis court ten bucks per person per day.............................10*2*7 = $140
- Mini-golf ten bucks per person per day..................................10*2*7 = $140
- Massage 20 bucks per person per day...................................20*2*7 = $280
- Speedboat 30 bucks per day..................................................30*7    = $210
- Subtotal .........................................................................................= $910

Uncle Thomas replied "but we didn't use any of these goodies!!" The receptionist told him that's our policy here. "Let me see the manager" asked Uncle Thomas.

The manager listens to Uncle Thomas and then explains "Our Hotel have extra staff and extra costs to maintain all these goodies and our guests enjoyed all of them". Uncle Thomas insists "But we didn't use any of them, we are on a honeymoon, if you know what I mean"
The manager was hard as a rock, "It's your problem, all these facilities are here, you should have use them"
Eventually Uncle Thomas draws a ten bucks bill, handed it to the manager and said "Okay so now we settle it". The manager looked surprised "But sir, your bill is 1,410 bucks and you pay me only ten bucks". "Yep," says Uncle Thomas "I charged you $200 per day for sleeping with my gorgeous wife."

"But I didn't!" exclaims the manager. "Well, well" Uncle Thomas replies, "she was available here, she was in the room, naked all day and night, laying in your king-size bed and you could have."

Ga. Nail Salon Charges Overweight Woman Extra

Charges like that are called in my slang Succeed, when the sniffy client asks "what the hell is succeed" the owner erase the line and says it did not work (succeed) this time. caveat emptor!

Oct 1, 2011

Working Apes

Monkeys as Waiters in Japan

Babysitter in India
That monkey arrives each day and help the mother taking care on her three weeks baby. At the end of the day the monkey eat a bowl rice (not too hot) and a glass of local beer.

Very Smart Monkey Show In Japan (part 1 of 3) AMAZING

Japan Funny Show-Intelligent Monkey Kwaii!

The chimps at the bar - old joke

The Chimp And The Dog  - China

Here is one of the sweetest songs, following me since I was a Kid - Lyrics
Arthur Collins & Byron Harlan sing - Aba Daba Honeymoon

Carleton Carpenter and Debbie Reynolds, performing Abba Dabba Honeymoon from Two Weeks with Love- LINK