Showing posts with label Fishing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fishing. Show all posts

May 26, 2011

Snap and Clap

    My friend Schwartz has one of the smallest private part you may imagine. He tried everything he spent a fortune on treatments and features but as you know it refused to change.
One day Schwartz was fishing at the lake, that day must be his bad day. he was not fishing any fish. he was pissed off and was ready to leave, when eventually he fish a strange fish. The fish starts speaking to him out of the water "I am the son of the Golden Fish, let me free and I will fulfill your wish". Schwartz didn't hesitate and asked the golden fish to make a miracle to his private part. The Golden fish waved his tail twice and instructed him "Snap your fingers one time and it will grew up by one inch, snapping twice will elongate it two inch and you may snap as long as you wish. but remember when you clap your hands once it will decrease by an inch Okay now let me free for God sake". Schwartz played all that night checking his new instrument. he was snapping and clapping and it was working.
Snap your fingers

    The next day Schwartz entered the best club in town. he was sitting on the Bar boozing his second Black Russian, when Dee came close and whispered in his ear "today is your lucky day man". Dee grabbed Schwartz by the arm to the second floor and after throwing her dress she called him to join him in bed.
    Dee never saw such a penis, she tried her best to grow it without success "hey man what happened to your tail, have you been with a woman before?" but then Schwartz snapped his fingers five times and the instrument elongate to six inch. "O boy" Dee said "I had never saw such a miracle before". Schwartz continued to pump up his tail by four more quick snaps and Dee cried "stop it for God sake" then Schwartz clap his hands twice and the instrument decreased as promised.
   Dee was really astonished by this, she never saw such an instrument. "come to mom" she told him. After they were connected Schwartz stayed still, "move man" ordered him Dee. Schwartz then start snapping and clapping, Chick Chuck, Chick Chuck.

Snap N Clap

Snap And Clap Sex
 

Mar 28, 2011

Old Fisherman

    Fishing at Times Square!
   An old fisherman was sitting near a deep puddle in Times Square and holds a fishing rod. Two Japanese tourists came closer and asked him to let them take, few shots with him. "I will charge you twenty bucks" said the fisherman. The elder Japanese handed him the bill, and after they finished taking the pictures with him the young Japanese asked the fisherman "Were you lucky today? how many fishes you hooked?". "you are mine third catch for today" replied the man.
Try hard to find the old fisherman in the clip!!!



 OMG bless the fishes.
  Two guys Brad and Tom were out fishing to the lake. Brad was unlucky, he tried changing hooks, floats and baits, but the fishes didn't want to get even close.  While Tom standing not too far away fetch the fishes without using the rod.
  Brad asked Tom how are you doing it? Tom told him "undress your pants and underwear and stand in the water, the fishes will come to bite your balls!, grab them out of the water as fast as you can". Ten minutes passed and Brad was still unlucky. Tom called him "what's up with you Brad, the fishes didn't like you?"
   Brad looks so happy "OMG bless the fishes, I will let them live"


  Anything you can do, I can do better 
  Two guys are talking about fishing. One says to the other, “I am NEVER going to take my wife fishing with me, ever again!” “That bad, huh” “She did everything wrong! She did everything wrong! She talked too much, made the boat rock constantly, tried to stand up in the boat, baited the hook wrong, used the wrong lures and WORST of all she caught more fish than me!”
Source




The Osprey went fishing link