Abe and Dee made a deal on their silver wedding day, whoever died first would come back and inform the other if there is sex after death.
After 49 years of marriage Abe passed away. One month later Abe made his first call. "Dee, are you with me?"
"Is that you, Abe?" "Yes, I've come back like we agreed."
"That's wonderful! What's it like?" "Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex. I have breakfast and then I'm chasing my butterflies.I have sex again, rest in the warm sun and then have sex a couple of more times. Then I have lunch , then pretty much have sex the rest of the afternoon. After supper, it's back playing with the females again. Then I went jogging with the team and just as I returned got more sex until late at night. I sleep without my pills and then the next day it starts all over again"
"Oh, Abe are you in Heaven?, did you had sex with some slebs?" "No Dee,..........I'm a rabbit in your backyard, look at me"
The two pictures were taken at my friend's backyard, they were the trigger for that joke. The origin of that Joke was the expensive fish dishes we use to pay. Great job Ofer D, thanks.
So Abe and Dee always complain why a nice fish dish cost a fortune. As Abe passed away after a month Dee dreamed about Abe. "How are you doing Abe?" asked Dee. Abe told here "In the morning I have fish, at lunch I have fish and for dinner I have fish" "Where are you at heaven?" asked Dee. "No I am an Osprey at Melbourne bay"
No one will convince me that our ancestors were apes. Just imagine only 50,000 generations ago a couple of apes gave birth to the first Homo ergaster, I do not believe to that scam.
Look at King Kong can you believe that mutations caused a transition from ape to man, why did not occur more such cases in other places. I had read The Selfish Gene and The Blind Watchmaker by Richard Dawkins, and I fell in love with that theory......figures and combination and statistical facts but at the end I believe that all the Biology science had adapted the theory of evolution like the tailor who patch your dress with a coarse thread.
While searching the web I assembled another tricky logic riddle.
On November 30, 1928, The Washington Post published the weekly column of the well-known astrologer Mr Black "My Forecast - we are heading Depression" Mr. Black warn his readers to draw their money out of the NY stock market!! which will crash October 1929 and will cause a 12 years depression. Mr. Black explained that the astrological charts are showing a world economical crisis due that the three planets, Jupiter, Pluto and Neptune will be turn an orbit, which will bring them on one line!! that will happened on Oct. 29 1929.
What's false here? the first correct answer will be published. If you like that one you might like to solve my Logic Riddle
After his last cow died from the FMDV (Foot Mouth Disease Virus) Tom lost all his savings. With his last 500 Bucks he decided to rebuild his dairy farm. Tom had two options to purchase a cow from a Manchester Dairy farm for 100 Bucks, or from a Liverpool dairy farm for 300 Bucks. Okay Tom was broke, so he bought three cows from the Manchester dairy farm. All three cows were producing each day six gallons of milk, and Tom was fine and starts dreaming about his new dairy farm.
The next month Tom asked his friend Bob to lend him his bull to mate with his cows. But unfortunately all the cows didn't let the bull to do his job, the cows always moved away. Tom called for the vet to help him, he told him about his three cows who refuse to let the bull mate them.
The vet arrived examine carefully the cows and finally said "I bet you 10 bucks these cows came from Manchester?" Tom was astonished by that and asked the vet "How did you know the origin of these cows is from Manchester?"
The vet answered "My wife is also from Manchester."
Crop art has sprung up across rice fields in Japan farmers creating the huge displays use different color rice plants that have been precisely arranged and grown in the paddy fields.
From ground level, the designs are invisible, and viewers have to climb the tower of the village, to enjoy the work.
Rice-paddy art was started there in 1993 as a local revitalization project, In the first nine years, the local farmers grew a simple design of Mount Iwaki every year. But their ideas grew more complicated and attracted more attention. In 2005, the farmers starts to create large scale of enormous rice paddy art. At 2006, the artists start useing computers to precisely plot the planting of four differently colored rice varieties.
During a service at the main synagogue of Budapest, when the "Shema" prayer was said, half the congregants stood up and half remained sitting. The half that was seated started yelling at those standing to sit down, and the ones standing yelled at the ones sitting to stand up.
The Rabbi, learned as he was in the law and commentaries, didn't know what to do. His congregation suggested that he consult the previous Rebbe Mr. Abe 102 years old .The Rabbi hoped Reb Abe would be able to tell him what the actual temple tradition was, so he went to Abe's home with a representative of each faction of the congregation.
The one whose followers stood during "Shema" said to Reb Abe, "Is the tradition to stand during this prayer?"
Reb Abe answered, "No, that is not the tradition."
The one whose followers sat said,"Then the tradition is to sit during "Shema"!"
Reb Abe answered, "No, that is not the tradition."
Then the rabbi said to Reb Abe, "But the congregants fight all the time, yelling at each other about whether they should sit or stand."
Reb Abe replied , "THAT is the tradition!"
During the summer holidays dog owners who can afford it send their beloved dogs to special summer camps for dogs. My friend sent me these funny clips so I share them with all dogs lover.
Here are some tips for dog owners. Dogs classroom
The surroundings of the Manneken Pis, giving an idea of its size.
My friend sent me a nice clip showing us where from a fish pee?, of course it's a candid camera. so I add also another clip of a candid camera showing the Brussels little boy Manneken Pisgetting nut's and pee on all the tourists, including me.
Dee went into a pet store in Hong Kong and asked for a special present for her husband. the seller shows her the way into the other room. he took out a parrot from his cage and puts it on an electric organ. The parrot starts playing the organ really good. "That's incredible!" says Dee. "how much is the price for the bird?" The seller told her "Mom it will cost you 75 grand, not a penny less". "Okay" said Dee "what else can you offer me?" The seller opened another cage and took out a small hamster and put it on the electric organ, giving him a piece of popcorn and the hamster starts singing like Johnny Cash.
Everyone in the store looks amazed by the hamster singing. Dee decided to buy the hamster for any price, cause her man might be so pleased hearing country music singed by the hamster. "I must have that hamster, will you sell him to me?" she asks. The small chinese charged her 400 bucks for the hamster and gave her a new cage for free.
Another chinese customer standing next to Dee, asked the seller "why are you selling that talent hamster so cheap?" "No I'm not," the seller replied. "The parrot is a ventriloquist"
Hamsters can't Play the Piano (and can't sing either)
A French passenger plane from Paris to NYC has an engine failure. The pilot speaks over the intercom ... "I'm sorry it has come to this ladies and gentlemen, but unfortunately we are going to have to jettison the luggage in order for the aircraft to remain airborne".
All the luggage was kicked off the plane, but still the plane's speed continues to
decrease. Once again the pilot gets on the intercom, "I hate to do this dear passengers but in order to save the majority we are going to have to start off-loading some passengers.
The only fair way is to do this alphabetically, so we'll start with the letter 'A'".
"Africans? Are there any Africans on board?" There was no answer so
the pilot calls, "Black people, are there any black people on board?" Again silence.
"C - coloured people? Are there any coloured people on board? Still there is silence.
A little black boy sitting near the rear of the plane turned to his mother and said, "Mom, Ain't we black? Ain't we coloured?" She replied, "Yes, son but for the moment we are Niggers. Let them do the Muslims first. If that don’t work, remember we are Zulus".